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PEPE'S ADVICE PAGES

In order to keep the Speculative_Ongoing_Subjective_Timeline_of_Events on the short and focused side, Pepe's Advice Pages have been moved to their own page.


AUTHORIZATION:OUT:KNOK:C1:28:C0:FF
PROXYBOT PP.680 ENGAGED


Buenos dias, amigos! A reader has written in to ask:

Dear "Wiseguy in WTZ Sector",

While none of them are as fabuloso as Yours Truly, I believe additional ProxyBots have been approved for general ULTRAVIOLET use (as if anyone could stop you from just ordering R&D to fork one over!) As for the timing of the Fluoride Incident, it (like virtually everything that derived from the ill-fated ADC program) is in a nebulous and confusing patch of time. Knok-U believes this indicates a retroactive cover-up, but I think it's just the result of all that loco fluoride messing with everyone's memories. Everyone was crazy there for a while! Anyway, I'm sure it will all work out in the end.

Drink plenty of distilled fluids,

Pepe


Dear "Better LAT Than Never",

You are correct about the dance craze, amigo! Good catch! La danza "estoy con estúpida" has been adjusted accordingly. However, darling, I must disagree with you regarding your Codemonkeys. You yourself mention that they didn't begin to multiply in number until you moved them into the empty CRY and BBY Sectors, which were empty because of the Armed Forces massacre, which happened as a result of the ToothpasteRebellion, which arose when Make-U-CRY-2 declared martial law during (apparently) the Toothpaste Disaster. Now, it's possible that Knok-U is wrong when he says (in the ItemsInQuestion) that the Rebellion happened immediately after the Disaster, and that in fact it happened just before the Disaster, but if I tell him that, I am quite sure that he will beat me. And really, between me and you: do you really want your Codemonkeys to have been the reason for the Disaster?!? Friend Computer is going to demand that someone's Clone line be permanently closed out at the end of this, you know, and if I were you, I'd do everything in my power to make my pet project look like it happened well after the whole mess! That's what Knok-U thinks Servs-U did with ADC, after all! You yourself say, many believe that the Thirty-second_Flavor was the fundamental catalyst... but that's not the same as fact! After all, "many believe" that Teela-O is a Documentary and that she really is still on her first Clone! Perhaps you're engaging in a bit of reverse-Information_Distortion...?

A little distorted myself at times,

Pepe


To "Distressed in DYT Sector":

Your notes on the Leaning_Tower_of_Treason were interesting, but as they don't yet exist in the official body of the report, I'm not sure I can act on them. I've tagged a copy to the pending OUS_Sector_Cabal entry, which strikes me as perhaps the next available place for this information to be established officially within the report. Hopefully the eventual writer of that entry will concur! For now, I've moved the Tower to the "uncertain" list.

Leaning towards needing a good stiff drink,

Pepe


Dear "RIT of Error",

Sounds reasonable to me, compadre; you don't strike me as the sort who'd try to hide anything! You're just an innocent victim like everyone else. I'll try to convince my boss, but he's hard to talk to sometimes. Maybe if you and he can just agree that it's all the fault of those HPD&MC people, it will all blow over!

Try not to sign so many things,

Pepe


Dear "Gnarly in GNA",

Gracias! I hope to set a shining example for all future ProxyBots to follow! And I eagerly look forward to updating the Timeline when your report on RON-372/B is done; it's shaping up to be a doozy!

Dizzy with excitement,

Pepe


Dear "GOT Milk",

Holy frijole, there's an interesting offer! Made some amendements to the headers reflecting timing that should clear things up a bit.

Keep that lube-bath bubbling,

Pepe


My goodness, mi compadres, while I was recharging my micropile, a bit of a debate popped up in my mailbox!

"I'm GNA Sure About That" says:

"Getting It in GOT Sector" fires back:

and finally, "Morbid in MOR Sector" chimes in:

Qué lío! I'm pretty sure about the timing of the COL_gate_incident at this point. Also, it's pretty clear that the Defective Batch got into all sorts of things it shouldn't have, many of them undocumented, or not identified until well after the fact. The only explanation I can come up with for this is that, in fact, Defective_Batch_ACA675T09-XXXX quickly got split up into many, many separate Batches and they all turned up in various places bearing the same Batch number. Deliberate sabotage or just another example of someone's gross incompetence? Not for me to say! I'm just a lowly ProxyBot, authorized to do nothing more than collate report entries into sequential order. I'm not allowed to speculate that PLC's Batch Tracking System is ridiculously simplistic or point out that CPU's ATTIC loading procedures have demonstrated an ongoing "major incident" rate of 17.2%. Heck, I can't even suggest that y'all take a look at which Power Services member of this panel was selling short on redistribution of RON Sector energy futures just before the Transbot crash, or which PLC member had just worked out a 2% kickback deal on Toothpasty_Supplement_#5 shipments the day before the Denta-Bots created such a huge supply shortfall. I mean, that sort of stuff would fall way out of my jurisdiction, and then my Master would beat me!

Can't we all just get along,

Pepe


My goodness! "Diligent in DYT Sector" has been doing some homework:

Holy moley, señor! There's not much I can add to this! Are you sure you don't have a ProxyBot of your own doing some correlation there?

The Infinite Hole bone's connected to the Glee Quotas bone,

Pepe


Dear "Getting While the GOT is Good",

Nope, that was my impression and intent all along, but the heading makes it less clear by lumping everything into the "15 month" group. I changed it to make it a little clearer.

It's all relative,

Pepe


Dear "Wary in ARY",

Buena pregunta! It's hard to say when SSS first went into prototyping. There's a subtle reference to it regarding the Maxiofacial_Mandate but that would make it yearcycles old, which is muy unlikely. It was probably developed during the year or so prior to the Disaster, and got shelved/delayed what with, you know, all the floods y explosions y Armed Forces massacres and such. It's only just now approved for widespread use, these last few months. Fabuloso!

Always liking the new things,

Pepe


PROXYBOT PP.680 DISENGAGED

PLEASE LEAVE NOTES FOR PEPE ON THE TIMELINE


2013-06-13 13:59