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Pearly Whites Tea Club

Pearly Whites Tea Club was a loose collective of powerful mutants united by their traitorous powers and their somewhat obsessive emphasis on dental hygiene. The Pearly Whites (as the members called themselves) were closely involved with several events of the Toothpaste Disaster. Luckily, the same events also sealed the fate of the collective, as it became unraveled in an almost unprecedented burst of secret society and IntSec activity.

According to IntSec investigations, the Pearly Whites were born when Best_Good_Happy_Sector_Hour was contaminated by Special_Brain_Freshening_Unit_K's subliminal messages, which in turn were subjected to Halle-B-RTN-4's tampering. The psycholinguistic programming seemed to affect clones with highly treasonous mutations, such as Teleportation, Desolidification, and the dreaded Machine Empathy. All the original Pearly Whites were low-clearance PLC employees, but as the collective grew in size, it acquired members from all services.

The name Pearly Whites Tea Club seems to be an ironic one, since the effect of TeaSir on dental hygiene rather precludes its consumption by any clones desiring to fulfill the requirements of Baseline_Dental_Health, let alone obsessive traitors seeking to remove any trace of Mutant_Plaque_Residuals.

The highly suspect mutations of the Pearly Whites soon attracted the attention of several secret societies and of course the ever-watchful eye of IntSec. As a result, the ranks of the collective soon swelled with agents and double agents of pro- and anti-mutant factions. By the time of the Toothpaste Disaster, the Pearly Whites were so thoroughly involved in internal conspiracies, that quadruple and quintuple agents were common within its ranks. As the events of the Toothpaste Disaster started to cascade, the conflicting orders and mental programming of the Pearly Whites started taking their toll. During the ToothpasteRebellion and the Tuesday_Afternoon_Conspiracy, Pearly Whites could be easily identified as extreme cognitive dissonance caused incoherent behavior. Several members went completely catatonic, while others engaged in self-destructive activities, often involving dental health products. The unsuitability of Floss+ for asphyxiation netted IntSec several valuable suspects for interrogation.

Refs: Baseline_Dental_Health, Best_Good_Happy_Sector_Hour, Halle-B-RTN-4, Mutant_Plaque_Residuals, ToothpasteRebellion, Tuesday_Afternoon_Conspiracy

-- Enkid-U-RUK-4

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2013-06-13 13:59