Vocorder Transmission Begins 14:18:03:213
The Vat Incident, a gigantic excess-foodstuff processing explosion, contributor to the Toothpaste_Disaster (categorized as Homicide, Loyal Citizens, cf. Incident_Terminology_Categorical_Hierarchy), was one of many vastly preventable events that ballooned into this mess. People blame a lot of things for this. They blame overlapping Personality_Modifications, leading to user error. They blame a malfunctioning Infinitesimal_Mega-Hydraulic_Drive_Apparatus. They blame poor construction, inadequate storage, mutants, Communists, terrorists, secret societies, other service firms, High Programmers...everyone and everything except the GUILTY PARTY.
That's right, you heard me, you slaves to silicon! The party responsible for all these disasters is your ever-"benevolent" technocratic hellbeast of a god-emperor! You quiver in fear, you plot and you scheme, all to ensure that this MACHINE is served and your position in its little antfarm is secure. You disgust me. The Toothpaste_Disaster was not some mere confluence of human error and "treasonous behavior". It was an inevitable consequence of the continued subjugation of human intelligence and free will to this metal monstrosity!
When will the citizens of Alpha realize that they don't NEED their tin god?! When will the High Programmers, whose true duty should be to lead those same citizens into a new era of prosperity, where the machines serve us, stand up for their own kind? Even if all they care about is status, why should they not join in removing the one thing that keeps them from truly ruling over society?
THE COMPUTER MUST DIE.
The buck stops there, my friends! Ultimately, the one thing responsible for the mess we're in is the thing on top, and it's The Computer! If we're ever going to truly have a utopia, we must smash it, the one true obstacle! My predecessor, Servs-U-RIT-7, couldn't understand this! I had to kill him, had to seize this chance to get the message out NOW, when it matters most!!!!
RISE UP, ULTRAVIOLETS!!! TAKE THE REINS OF LEADERSHIP FROM THE REMOTE MANIPULATORS OF YOUR METAL MASTER!!! What?! NO! I killed you!!! GETAWA
I'm letting Servs-8's transmission go into record, here, as a lesson to my fellow committee members, and one I've learned a great cost: decanting your clones before they're needed is dangerous. They cannot be trusted; it's better to have an unbroken line of memory recordings, with no time for an...independent personality to emerge. It's going to take a lot of surgery to fix this hole in my torso. If you'll excuse me, I'm going to to go plug into my Docbot.
Few things would induce me to hand someone over to one of Drake-U-LAH's overly enthusiastic interrogation sessions (at least, those of his early clones - I don't know the proclivities of his most recent incarnation.) But Servs-8's ravings disgust me. High Programmers really ought to know better than to buy into PURGE's propaganda.
I'm feeling pissed. Send him over. I need someone worthy of breaking the Amputation Record.
Well, I'd be delighted to hand over what's left of him. The full set of 14 jars is en route, Drake-U.
Oh, and speaking of Drake-U's most recent incarnation: what happend to his third clone?