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Syntelligent Systems

As you may know, Watt-U has been demoted to INFRARED and the clone line was later discontinued. Here are the only factual details I could gather from the old report, scrubbed of treason by me, Omega-U:


"R&D Service Firm Syntelligent Systems successfully completed the project, producing the first in a new series of miniaturized Asimov Circuits."

"Sadly, several batches of defective Asimov Circuits made it through Syntelligent Systems Quality Assurance labs (An oversight, which the original QA testers' clones insist cannot recur due to recently updated test plans)."

-- Asimov_Circuit_Miniaturization

"Circ-U-LAT's Syntelligent Systems"

"In order to "ensure quick cross-pollination of experiments", they stored their experimental substances and manufacturing compounds in the same database unit. This error was quickly taken advantage of by a treasonous group of File Sharers, eager to retaliate against Syntelligent Systems for their development of "Electronic Security Measure Capice"."

"Most startling of all was the fact that the whole thing could've been avoided had Syntelligent Systems installed "Electronic Security Measure Capice" on their own systems."

-- Defective_Batch_ACA675T09-XXXX

"The CyberHack Programming Helmet was without a doubt the most important, ULTRAVIOLET clearance project of Syntelligent Systems. Intended as a replacement for all the outmoded ways we ULTRAVIOLET High Programmers program, it was to give the ultimate Virtual Imagination experience, allowing High Programmers to manipulate programs on a whole new level."

"Presented with such data, I believe that the File Sharers' attack on Syntelligent Systems might've been more than just an act of revenge. Suppose some other Secret Society egged them on and used the defective chips for their own schemes?"

-- CyberHack_Programming_Helmet

"Based upon the facts that traitors are fundamentally lazy (as industry is mandatory, they must lack it) and that a treasonous intrusion requires immense luck to bypass the nigh-perfect security systems already provided by Friend Computer, Cap-R-ICE, then and now a researcher at Syntelligent Systems, designed a stochastic, Quasi-Random system which, when it deems the time right, requires the user to re-enter their security information in full, and can, additionally, simply terminate the user-session, or, if it so chooses, the user."

-- Electronic_Security_Measure_Capice

"Clearly an investigation of Syntelligent Systems is in order, as well as any possible connection to COLgate BioTech, considering how many other threads in the Disaster seem to lead there (including the apparent role of one Jen-I-COL-3 in making the defective circuits available to the Denta-Bots project)."

-- Flossbot_Mk_II

"I have found that a full 78% of Citizens involved in virtually every incident were in that position as the result of a recent FART, including (but not necessarily limited to): the lead quality engineers at Syntelligent Systems who approved Defective Batch ACA675T09-XXXX"

-- Group_Assignment_Services_Exchange_Scheme_(GASES)

"Addendum: It has come to my attention that Syntelligent Systems has conducted research on Gatzmann's software. I would suggest an additional level of precautions on any experiments with such code."

-- Jackobot_Brain

"For example, I know that some R&D units still do all their microboard tape-out using something very much like 737R15, instead of using the much more current software that PLC uses for mass-production. I know the current theory is that Syntelligent Systems was hacked by filesharers and there was a mixup involving B4 that created Defective_Batch_ACA675T09-XXXX, but is it possible that this is just a cover to conceal faulty handling of 737R15?"

-- Legacy_software


So, as you can see, they're a treasonous bunch, controlled no doubt by one or more secret societies involved in this disaster. But I'm far too busy with other matters to worry about them further. Comment if you find anything worthwhile to say about them.

-- Omega-U, scrubbing out the treasonous parts of Watt-GOT (formerly Watt-U)'s entry.


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2013-06-13 14:00