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Reactor Operational Function Lackey (ROFL)

-- Begin Report--

I finally have concrete evidence of the true nature of the single event that caused the Four_Reactor_Foam_Flood. Usually a clone is assigned the task of being a Reactor_Operational_Function_Lackey_(ROFL), after being so trained on the Helmet_Of_Education. It seems that The Computer in It's infinite wisdom, had placed a jackobot with the INFRARED_Citizens to be trained for this position. I traced this Jackobot all the way down to the chair it was sitting in. Ordinarily, a Jackobot_Brain would not be able to undergo the imprinting of the Helmet_Of_Education. From that chair, however, we discovered a CyberHack_Programming_Helmet that had been reverse-engineered to program to instead of from. Not only was the Helmet compromised, it also contained one of the Defective_Batch_ACA675T09-XXXX chips. On top of all of this, the jackobot in question was running a certain amount of Legacy_software and had come in contact with the Little_Red_Disk. This bot should have been reduced to slag. Instead, it was reassigned to Nuclear_Facility_RON-372/B, as a Reactor Operational Function Lackey(ROFL). This Jackobot is the most likely suspect in the Four_Reactor_Foam_Flood.

-- Screwz-U-BAD-3

But would its non-presence have changed anything about the ATTIC crash? Seems like a reach to me.

-- Paul-U-LEG-9

I agree that it seems a reach. However, it cannot be completely ruled out that the ATTIC crash might have been arranged specifically to destroy the Jackobot - though I confess I find this unlikely in the extreme. While the competence of several of the malefic parties involved in the Toothpaste Disaster seems sufficient to have cracked the Legacy_software which selected the Transbot route (thus causing the Four_Reactor_Foam_Flood at that particular time - the sabotage itself was due to Project [In]Finite Hole rivalries and/or Infinitesimal_Mega-Hydraulic_Drive_Apparatus testing, though either of those could also have been engineered by parties unknown), the Flood itself and/or distraction for theft of the Little_Red_Disk seem to me the most likely motives, followed by power loss and/or assault upon Friend Computer's harvesting of True Randomness (see Quasi-Random).

-- Err-U-DYT-9

Ah, I've found it. The Jackobot, as a recent transfer, was the automatically-generated most likely suspect for the Four_Reactor_Foam_Flood at the time of that event. Since this report hasn't been released yet, it's still listed as the most likely suspect in the official documentation.

-- Err-U


2013-06-13 14:00